Happy 6th Anniversary to Mackel9’s Blog! It is now 6 years down this line of random stories from the experiences all around the world. I would like to thank all of you fam and a special mention goes to @Woolie he is never shy to leave a trail. That is not to leave out the ghost readers, I always see you in my stats, Thank you! 🙂
Category Archives: Comfort zone.
It is 4.56 pm, I am reviewing what i have done for the day as I prepare to call it a day, Then I get a text from a bew number, I would have ignored it with the many scams happening around hadn’t he used my name…
Hi Mackel, how are you doing? Can I ask you something? There’s something that has been on my mind for a while now and I need to ask…
I try searching the number on true caller app as I wonder who could this be? No results! How convenient right?
I’m good, how about you? Who am I speaking to?
Well, I used to see you a lot in this joint and we’d pass each other in the hallways. I don’t think you noticed me but I used to like you a lot… Are you gay?
At that moment I nearly choked. I look around the bus to see if there are any faces that look familiar and probably called Ndirangu who are texting, because if this was a prank… ah ah not funny at all.
NO Ndirangu, I am not gay. I love women. How did you get my number?
Well I am sorry for bothering you Mackel, do have a lovely evening.
The rest of my journey was troubled, I call all my friends who we’d go to the said joint. Nobody had a clue. I try sending money via M-Pesa, the name that shows up is totally strange and not Ndirangu!
Why would he think I was gay, is it the way I walk, talk what? I have never worn skinny pants all my life, it can’t be what I wear. To date I am still baffled by that encounter, being hit on by a gay man was surely a first for me…
What are some of your LGBT experiences as a straight person? Please do share…
On this arena of dating I am not a guru
I am a very late Bloomer and never try to.hide that fact, I will say things which have been said before and probably I will say the same thing in different ways. There I have broken the first rule of story telling, never pre-empt anything at the beginning or start by apologizing/explaining yourself… but screw rules, we are talking about dating and there are not rules in this *#@@#
1. Don’t be boring
People want to be around (read date) interesting people people who excite them. I don’t know what this is all about, but listen a lot and if you pick out “remember when you/we did this? That was pretty awesome” and be doing that more often than the things a that don’t get mentioned.
2. Fake spontaneity if you have to but have a plan in your head
I think for the people who like knowing exactly what is going to happen and how it is going to happen, spontaneity is something we struggle with. We always have a plan. You know what you will do this weekend and next and the next after next. We have a list we cross off and keep adding new things. But you know what? Some people hate that, so how to you ensure you keep this interesting person who wants you to be a free like a butterfly like themselves? I won’t tell you to throw your list, no, but hide it!!! There you have it. Hide your list and ensure you only unleash the items on it the very last minute, how spontaneous is that? Pretty much, yes? You are welcome 😉
3. Be random
Never let your relationship reach point where you anticipate each other or it becomes routine. Be too random at times it scares and at the same time excites them. So yes you had been saving to take her/him on vacation to Madagascar and an opportunity to go skydiving in Diani happens, take her/him *disclaimer you are responsible for your financial management if you get into woes don’t say Mackel said. In hindsight the opportunity cost will be a healthy relationship ey?*
So there you have it, follow these tricks on dating and you will see yourself moving out of the friend zone more often. These apply to both girls and guys.
He offered her all she ever dreamt of
In her young and impressionable self, this was the life
Then slowly the ugly head started rearing itself
He knew her every move. Stalker! Or is it PIs?
Who she talked to where she had been
He knew even the conversations she had on her phone
And not once did she see him pick up her phone to scroll!
Who are you? She often wondered to herself…
He threatened to hurt everyone he deemed competition
She was scared
She knew he was capable of what he said
She withdrew even from her closest friends
He owned her, it was an abusive relationship
And all that glitter was not worth the sacrifice
One day she packs and decides she is about to runaway and never look back. And there she started recreating her life back again.
How far are you willing to go/ sell your soul inorder to get the good life?
Yes I am on tinder! I never thought I would join online dating sites but I finally found myself downloading tinder at 12 am….
How it all begins
I used to be that person whose messenger would read “this person responds to messages in less that 20 minutes” and so were most of my friends. You’d find someone to talk to at 3am on those sleepless nights and you will the night away.
With time these friends they tell you, I found someone and as the rules dictate, when a friend finds someone you cannot be sending messages past nine unless you want to cause problems. And we all want our friends to prosper, yes? And even the conversation patterns start telling you when is a good time to talk. If all messages sent past 8.27pm get responses at 9.11 am, it can only mean you gave to work around 9.00 am and 8.00pm for any meaningful conversation to happen.
One two three they keep finding people, but you seem to be the one not too keen on it, so what do you do? You start looking, and guess what? The people in your age group are not about that life of talking anymore, they are all “searching” there are clocks ticking, well except me lol
It is 12 am, I am in my bed and it has, and still is raining heavily. Everyone has switched off, I think why not try tinder, I keep hearing about it. I go to the play store and find a host of dating apps, badoo etc etc. So those badoo email notifications I used to see, this was what it was all about? I download my tinder and authenticate and register my details. All is done and I start swiping. I swipe swipe swipe swipe and swipe some more. I go to sleep. In the morning I have three matches! Awesome :-). I hope the knowi just want to talk late at night not really date :-D, but let me wait and see. Wish me luck
I just hope if I meet freaks, crazies and weirdo’s, it is of the good type not the bad type lol *crosses fingers*
Now that we are in that phase where many people are discovering themselves, or getting to find their personal legend “yup I finally read the alchemist after a year of procrastinating but that is a post for another day”. My friend was telling me of a story of the things she thought she wanted and how now she looks at herself and realizes her path was paved in a totally different direction. She wishes to remain anonymous so let me welcome miss anonymous 🙂
I am not one of the few people who had a career figured out when I was in primary school or high school. It took me a while to figure out that I wanted to be a Human Resources Professional after a stint in an International Trade and Banking. I guess it is because at fourteen years old, I did not have an understanding of what a Human Resources Management entailed unlike in the fields of Finance, Law, Architecture and Medicine.
If I was to write a letter to my fourteen year old self, this is what I would tell her:
Dear fourteen year old miss anonymous,
From an older wiser you, this is what I want you to do:
- Continue with your hobby, if you did not have one, find it.
- When you join campus, engage yourself in all the activities, sports, clubs etc. There are so many activities that one can get involved in, find at least three.
- Party and have fun but also read and make sure you get good grades.
- Find internships in where your interest lays, right from the time you are in first year. (I remember I did an accounting internship, and that’s when I discovered I never wanted to be an Accountant, look at who would be doing a boring Accounting job)
- Travel, there are lots of opportunities to travel locally with clubs in campus and guess what you get everything at the student’s rate which is way cheaper. Explore your country, maybe go to museums, the national park, the list is endless.
- As soon as you get a job, move out of your parents’ house. When you move out, you grow up and start becoming responsible. Lucky me, my parents were not living in Nairobi so I had to move out by force when I landed a job.
- Follow your gut. The best advice you will ever get will come from your gut instinct.
- Always try something new.
- The sky is the limit (cliché I know)
It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about? – Henry David Thoreau
Like wildflowers; you must allow yourself to grow in all the places people thought you never would.
With a lot of love I am yours,
Older miss anonymous :-*
Hello gang, how have you been? I know I haven’t had enough time to come here, I keep telling myself to stop with the laziness…
Now I was having a chat with a friend on something I have started noticing too. My friend was on her way to work when she sits next to a guy. After checking her out she started behaving funny and all fidgety to which my friend thought “pickpocket” and clutched her bag tightly. Our guys removed his phone and started texting then he started nudging her. She asks him what? He shows her the draft text “niaje babes si unipe hiyo namba? (loosely translated to hi there babes can I have your number?)”
She burst out laughing and said hell no, I mean he skipped all the norms of good manners. Starting with a hello, introduction etc etc and went straight for the kill. What did he take her for? Was this the new way of making new friends? Where you whip out your phone to text “niaje babes….?” and show it to a perfect stranger? Maybe he thought if she saw his fancy phone, her heart would melt and she would tell him “oh yes you can have my number, and my home address, I think I love you and I want to marry you already, we will have three babies and a four bedroom bungalow in the leafy suburbs….”
Apparently that was the second time someone did that. They don’t talk to you, they nudge you and expect you to just go along with whatever little plan that is going through their little heads. This made me ask around and I was dismayed yo learn it happens to even guys! Has texting and all this new technological advances changed how we should behave? Should we expect cocktail parties and networking events where people will only be showing their little phone screens to the other people around? Is that where we are going? Is that the future? Two people in the same room but you can only chat? Picture this
Wife: (via chat) There is a snake in the house
Husband (replies) Oh you mean the one sitting next to me?