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Category Archives: Maturity

Its been six years! Happy Anniversary Mackel9's Blog

Happy 6th Anniversary to Mackel9’s Blog! It is now 6 years down this line of random stories from the experiences all around the world. I would like to thank all of you fam and a special mention goes to @Woolie he is never shy to leave a trail. That is not to leave out the ghost readers, I always see you in my stats, Thank you! 🙂

Happy 6th anniversary @mackel9'sblog

Happy 6th anniversary @mackel9‘sblog

 

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Broken!

5 September 2016 095145 GMT+0300
She met this guy, he was her world, everything she thought she ever wanted.
He had that flair, made her happy, incredibly so. One day her friend tells her how her “man” is hers and for many others too.
She couldn’t believe it, how could her friend try to destroy what she had yearned for for such a long time.
Why couldn’t she let them prosper?
But love is blind, thank God, that, her friend knew….
She invited her friend to go out at this new place.
They walk in and guess who they find at the corner lounge kissing someone else?
Her bae, lover, man…
She couldn’t believe it.
She felt so betrayed, when she had just thought she had finished her search for the one, then this?
How now?
She started doubting love exists, but she still believed in it, because the fire that he had lit, even though it had now died, it yearned to be reignited.
Broken!

He had met her in church.
She was very coy, something he found irresistibly alluring.
He chased her for as long as he could remember.
Then one day as he walked her home from church she said yes.
Imagine the joy, he felt like could burst.
Finally he had found someone he could introduce to his friends and family.
His baby girl moved to another town for work, they promised each other to stay faithful.
The future was bright for them as a couple, they would joke about how many babies they would have.
He wanted many, she wanted two, twins if the heavens willed it.
Communication started waning, the long evening calls started being short and far in between.
He asks for leave, picks his bag and travels to see his baby girl.
He can not let this fire die, he had to show the commitment.
After travelling the whole day, he got to the other town, went to a store and bought her those white chocolates she loves and a flower.
Yes a flower. Because he wanted her and only her forever to be by his side, that is how committed he was.
He walks up her doorway and rings the bell.
A man in boxer shorts opens the door, he asks where she was.
He is told she was in the kitchen.
“Babe, who is it?” she calls out across the hallway.
The guy in boxer shorts replies with, “there is someone here with a message for you.”
She comes through the doorway in a nightdress and stops on her tracks frozen.
He stands up says hello to her, picks his bags and leaves.
Not another word, he gives the chocolates to a street boy, and he books the next bus home.
On his trip back he thanks God for not carrying his firearm, he would have made another statistic.
He calls his boy and pours his heart out the whole commute.
He cannot believe she could do this to him.
After he had made all these commitments for a lifelong future with her….
Broken!

 

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The abusive relationship

He offered her all she ever dreamt of
In her young and impressionable self,  this was the life
Then slowly the ugly head started rearing itself
He knew her every move. Stalker! Or is it PIs?
Who she talked to where she had been

He knew even the conversations she had on her phone

And not once did she see him pick up her phone to scroll!

Who are you? She often wondered to herself…
He threatened to hurt everyone he deemed competition
She was scared
She knew he was capable of what he said
She withdrew even from her closest friends
He owned her, it was an abusive relationship
And all that glitter was not worth the sacrifice

Domestic violence

One day she packs and decides she is about to runaway and never look back. And there she started recreating her life back again.

How far are you willing to go/ sell your soul inorder to get the good life?

 

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Six things you need to know about dating a girl who's above 25

So of late my friends think I have become good with women but the reality is women have become good with me. Dating a girl that is above 25 brings out a new perspective on the word date here is a few of the things I have made discoveries on:

1. Exclusivity
Whereas when she was younger she wouldn’t mind tagging along with a couple of friends to your dates, now if you are having a date it will be just you two. You get the time to really get to catch up and talk without trying to engage a third wheel who might not be privy to some of the things you talk about.

2. Less alcohol
While before going out in a club counted as a date. The girl who is 25 and above will prefer a proper date, not a drinking date. Even if there will be alcohol it is just to keep the story going not to make you too drunk you need to be carried home.

3. Content
The 25 plus girl will mostly be talking about her future, that MBA she intends to start or finish on, that deal she hears from PRC for a ka plot in Nanyuki (who lives in Nanyuki though?), getting the right partner because in a few years time she intends to settle down and she also talks alot about money and being upwardly mobile. This girl seems very clear about what she wants and how she will get there.

4. Bullshit
This is the biggest development you find. If she tells you “oh I have a bullshit detector” she is lying. But if you say something crappy and she stops you and tells you “you are shitting me right now” there you have found a girl who won’t accept to feed on crap.

5. Making the first move

Uncle Norman: Two and a half men

Uncle Norman: Two and a half men

She knows when a guy likes her and is too scared to ask. Well this is not from my personal experience but from observation around hehe. She will throw things like, my evening tomorrow is free would you like to grab some coffee as the rain caused traffic eases? Or I know how really like chapo and I just know the place, it is the best kept secret when it comes to chapos.

6. Sex
If you have ever been involved in procurement process you know how you start with pre-qualifying suppliers. Basically sex will never be just random with this girl. If you ask nicely and she says yes, she premeditated about all the scenarios and knew how they’d play out in her head before. So you are the puppet. She will never say yes if she doesn’t want to. And most importantly if she wants to she is not too shy to initiate, at first she will be coy about it then it gets more broad about it depending on the partner’s response.

If you are a lady over 25 what has changed since you hit a quarter century? If you are a guy what are the changes you are noticing?

 

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The older you get the lonelier it becomes

“The older you get the lonelier it becomes. Social life keeps dying as we become more and more upwardly mobile,” she said over lunch
Now that we are past quarter century old. The excitement if being to be your own person has died out a d you are spending more and more time thinking about the future and what are some of the things you need to get done and soon. Be it that plot, be it going back to school, be it changing jobs, paying dowry… whatever it might be. Time becomes something precious and weekends don’t last that long as before you never seen to get much done in the same 24 hours because the backlog keeps on piling. Even as you sleep less and less the time doesn’t seem to stretch even one tiny inch. You start realising as you pursue your own legend and become more upwardly mobile (whatever that means) or like one client calls it the prime age for bank loans, credit cards and spending money you do not have, just because you can and the bank will oil it. One day you wake up in your house full of many toys and possessions but still feel a deep void inside. Because even with all the things that you thought money would bring with it you are still lonely. Your relationships are struggling; family, riendships and even the romantic ones. You have many friends on social media platforms and when you get notifications on an interaction you get excited but even that last as long as the notification light stays on.
Well some say even if no one else loves them the money will, but you find the friends they proclaim are the good time only friends. The ones who are there for WIIFM what’s in it for me. The moment their self interest is not served you are done and unapologetically so. If you lose that job or that hustle that binds your activities you are your own my friend. So if you want to test out who you will stick through the long journey called life, you need to start picking out some traits.
Who is the person who can face you and tell you enyewe we are friends but you are bullshitting right now
Who makes sure they pay a courtesy call for no absolute reason because they want to know how you are doing (for myself I might pay one because of power outage and I need my rechargeables charged)
Who attends your key milestone events even when there were other more fun interesting options?
Please help me build this list. What makes you decide this is a relationship I want to maintain and this one it is time it was severed.

All relationships are like bank accounts for you to withdraw you have to make deposits first, emotional, time etc… otherwise you need to reconcile your account – Mackel Tisa

 

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Tinder


Yes I am on tinder! I never thought I would join online dating sites but I finally found myself downloading tinder at 12 am….

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How it all begins
I used to be that person whose messenger would read “this person responds to messages in less that 20 minutes” and so were most of my friends. You’d find someone to talk to at 3am on those sleepless nights and you will the night away.
With time these friends they tell you, I found someone and as the rules dictate, when a friend finds someone you cannot be sending messages past nine unless you want to cause problems. And we all want our friends to prosper, yes? And even the conversation patterns start telling you when is a good time to talk. If all messages sent past 8.27pm get responses at 9.11 am, it can only mean you gave to work around 9.00 am and 8.00pm for any meaningful conversation to happen.

And then?
One two three they keep finding people, but you seem to be the one not too keen on it, so what do you do? You start looking, and guess what? The people in your age group are not about that life of talking anymore, they are all “searching” there are clocks ticking, well except me lol

Tinder
It is 12 am, I am in my bed and it has, and still is raining heavily. Everyone has switched off, I think why not try tinder, I keep hearing about it. I go to the play store and find a host of dating apps, badoo etc etc. So those badoo email notifications I used to see, this was what it was all about? I download my tinder and authenticate and register my details. All is done and I start swiping. I swipe swipe swipe swipe and swipe some more. I go to sleep. In the morning I have three matches! Awesome :-). I hope the knowi just want to talk late at night not really date :-D, but let me wait and see. Wish me luck

PS. Concerns

I just hope if I meet freaks, crazies and weirdo’s, it is of the good type not the bad type lol *crosses fingers*

 

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Letter to my fourteen year old self – Guest Post

Now that we are in that phase where many people are discovering themselves, or getting to find their personal legend “yup I finally read the alchemist after a year of procrastinating but that is a post for another day”. My friend was telling me of a story of the things she thought she wanted and how now she looks at herself and realizes her path was paved in a totally different direction. She wishes to remain anonymous so let me welcome miss anonymous 🙂

***

I am not one of the few people who had a career figured out when I was in primary school or high school. It took me a while to figure out that I wanted to be a Human Resources Professional after a stint in an International Trade and Banking. I guess it is because at fourteen years old, I did not have an understanding of what a Human Resources Management entailed unlike in the fields of Finance, Law, Architecture and Medicine.

If I was to write a letter to my fourteen year old self, this is what I would tell her:

Dear fourteen year old miss anonymous,

From an older wiser you, this is what I want you to do:

  1. Continue with your hobby, if you did not have one, find it.
  2. When you join campus, engage yourself in all the activities, sports, clubs etc. There are so many activities that one can get involved in, find at least three.
  3. Party and have fun but also read and make sure you get good grades.
  4. Find internships in where your interest lays, right from the time you are in first year. (I remember I did an accounting internship, and that’s when I discovered I never wanted to be an Accountant, look at who would be doing a boring Accounting job)
  5. Travel, there are lots of opportunities to travel locally with clubs in campus and guess what you get everything at the student’s rate which is way cheaper. Explore your country, maybe go to museums, the national park, the list is endless.
  6. As soon as you get a job, move out of your parents’ house. When you move out, you grow up and start becoming responsible. Lucky me, my parents were not living in Nairobi so I had to move out by force when I landed a job.
  7. Follow your gut. The best advice you will ever get will come from your gut instinct.
  8. Always try something new.
  9. The sky is the limit (cliché I know)

It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about? – Henry David Thoreau
Like wildflowers; you must allow yourself to grow in all the places people thought you never would.

 

With a lot of love I am yours,

Older miss anonymous :-*

 

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