Tag Archives: Suicide

Grim reaper still has a noose!

It has been several years now, still more questions than answers when you think about grim reaper and his noose.
He was a good guy. The last person you’d think could ever be stressed. He also knew how to turn everything into something to smile and laugh about. Then one day, something snapped. He climbed to the top floor of a eight story building and jump he did.
When we all met, no one seemed to understand how such a jovial soul would do such a deed. The people who were always pessimistic with a dim view of the future, the ones we were always worried about never hurt themselves not even a little prick. Maybe they all needed our equal love and concern. But how could you tell under the mask of happiness on his face?
Grim reaper still has a noose 😔
He was 11 years old. His parents were having issues. He would wonder why this was happening to him. Why was his family the one to break? His father and mother never openly disagreed infront of him. They would attend family functions together and the outside world saw them as a happy family. But in the confines of the four walls of their house, they were all lonely inside. They felt like they were in small jail cells. These cells would be broken when they had guests and other family members visit, you could see the teary eyes when those visits came to an end. They would wish the stay could have been extend even for a day, because the house seemed to large empty and haunting. Everyone would be doing their own thing. Was he the cause of all this trouble? Once in a while he would catch his mother crying, when she thought he had gone out to play. He would go and lock himself in his bedroom and ask God why this was happening and if he would ever see a semblance of happiness in his family. One day she quarelled him and he felt this overwhelming feeling that he couldn’t take it anymore. He went and mixed a concotion of pestiscide and fruit juice and drank it all up. He then went to his bedroom and lied down to wait for his death to come. He reckoned death would bring eternal peace as they wrote in that obituary section of the papers. After thirty minutes he started feeling dizzy and a sharp pain coming from his stomach. He felt a huge need to vomit and quickly rushed to the toilet. He vomited a dark concotion with a mixture of blood. He felt all weak and wondered whether this was death coming. He started feeling regret and made a quick prayer to God, to save him this one time. His mother found him with vomit in his mouth and unflushed toilet full of a mixture of pestiscide and blood with a putrid smell. She quickly carried him to the car and called his father as she drove crazily to the hospital.
He had attained gastrointestinal burns due to the corrosive nature of the pesticide and had to be put on drip for quite a while. When his father came he went over to his mother and as they watched over him. They wondered silently, if they had caused all this? Where had they gone wrong as parents. Some questions had no answers really…
As they all thanked the Lord for his mercies, they well understood that the Grim reaper almost had a noose…
I couldn’t bring myself to narrate the third and fourth occasions Grim Reaper had a noose, as they are still fresh and baffling.  What makes people take their own lives. What are the signs and symptoms? Are there remedies?


Posted by on October 14, 2016 in Grim reaper, Stories


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Grim reaper had a noose…

I knew him for four years, a quiet chap with some crazy stories and love for cars especially the Rolls Royce Phantom, I was sure that at some time he would get one and maybe I get a ride and do those gangster stunts I saw on the Godfather saga with them suicide doors… The times we talked he had a story to tell, happy stories, crazy stories never sad ones!!! I guess we had our faces masked, covered with damned happy faced masks, while inside we had a need to reach out, someone to tell what lay in our damned cocoons of hearts.  But then again who wants to listen to your problems right? Kila mtu na shida zake, ama?

I remember saying hi on the corridors on a Wednesday, him asking if I saw somebody, and I replying to the negative and like that we continued with our shelled appearances. Come Thursday friends say they saw him, he was his usual self nothing out of the ordinary. After meeting with his group for an assignment he left for home. He usually played football with the boys; this lifted his spirits most of the time it was better than talking since he dropped his mask in those times even with the teasing, I guess that was the time he was his real self, naked before fellow men 🙂. His father was a nice man, he said they got along well, actually he said they were “boys” with his son. They joked, shared and understood each other. He said he had a problem, they were aware of it, but they supported him all through and he always managed to emerge stronger. The future for him was paved, it was all bare for him to take on… then the son called him early morning, they share a joke and wish each other a great day ahead. The Mom said she was close with him way to close that they shared on a level that is not usual between mothers and sons.

On Friday his father got calls from relatives, I heard it from friends, was shocked the whole day, a noose is how life got separated from his body, but God is the judge, he decides… I remember the pain on his father’s voice though he appeared strong, and the sorrow on his mother’s face; this got me thinking, yes we have these masks we are always wearing, plastic smiles we have learned so well to dish out while our hearts bleed out. Like a confession box I will let you keep your mask on, but on condition you fungua roho yako ONGEA, but this “Kuongea” is literal not the condom ad version. You can start talking in 3, 2, 1… now!! Wherever Paul is, I pray that God rests his soul in peace.


Posted by on January 30, 2012 in Grim reaper, Just Random, Noose


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